self determination

There is a lot of talk about self-determination and being self-directed in the peer community.  I don’t believe self-determination can be taught. Self-determination is the process by which and motivation to take control of one’s life. I believe it can be nurtured and encouraged by others, but ultimately it comes from within. I also believe that everyone has the capacity to develop a strong sense of self-determination under the right circumstances. Those circumstances include being surrounded by people who believe in one’s ability to direct one’s life with the strengths and talents inherent to them. Given the right opportunities for growth, everyone can develop self-determination.

On the other hand, I do believe that self-direction can be taught. Self-direction is action that comes directly from insight into one’s strengths, talents and abilities. So as a peer specialist I am tasked with the job of assisting other peers in identifying and honoring their strengths. If a peer has clear insight into what they can accomplish with the resources they have then they can direct their life in any way they choose.

In the most practical sense, I never do anything for a peer that they can do for themselves. If a peer needs literacy skills I may research agencies, but they do the foot work of calling to get information and making appointments. If a peer has a goal of going back to college or getting their GED, then I work with them to create an action plan with the steps necessary to make it happen. In the process of “making it happen” people’s self-determination is nurtured and strengthened. As they get to know what they can accomplish their confidence grows and they become more self-sufficient.

While working with people with mental health differences this nurturing can be a challenge on many fronts. Typically, people who live with schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, major depression, anxiety, etc. are told by well-meaning and genuinely concerned supporters that they can’t do much for themselves. They are often times treated like they are fragile and any challenges will send them spiraling back to the hospital. They too often are told that they can’t manage their money, make decisions, live on their own or even choose what they do in their leisure time.

Peers are told they will never work a job, have healthy satisfying family lives or really ever contribute anything worthwhile to their communities. These harmful limitations are not imposed out of malice. These determinations are made by people who care. They are made by do-gooders like social workers, doctors, day program leaders, and family members. These determinations are well intended, but inaccurate and stifling. After hearing what a person can’t do over and over again, a person will come to believe it and sadly expect everyone they come in contact with to do something for them. This may look like an attitude of entitlement, but it is not. It is learned helplessness.

To be sure, living with a mental health difference can be challenging and even limit the kinds of things we can do. For example, I know with my own mental health issues I can’t work a 50 hour a week job. I won’t work nights and weekends to get the job done. I can however, work a solid 40 hours a week and be fully present and effective during that 40 hours. Everyone, mental difference or not, has limitations. The point is, no one should be told what they can or can’t accomplish. Life is about self discovery, figuring out what is and isn’t possible. No one should stifle this process for anyone else. By the same token, no one should impose unrealistic expectations on others. People can do what they do and it’s only our love, compassion and support that will help them catapult themselves into places they never thought they could go.

Self-determination is personal. No one can tell another what direction they can or should go in. No one else can do that for us. There is no timeline either. Everyone moves at their own pace. Those of us who support peers in moving forward know all too well that sometimes we have to “hold the hope” for others. We can see the potential in them for growth, but until they see it for themselves and embrace it nothing will happen. So we hold the hope for them until they can hold it for themselves.